How to get a fan

Fan Q&A
Source: Amazon | Honeywell HT-900 TurboForce Air Circulator Fan Black

I was recently in the market for a fan, and as you can see from my market research above, it was pretty easy to get all my questions answered.

Trying to get fans of my writing? That’s a different story.

First of all, you have to write.

Have I written?

Nope. Not much. A little here and there. Mostly been working on this one novel my whole life. And though I’ve talked about it to nearly every single person I’ve met since 1996, you don’t know if I’m any good at writing. Or if you’ll even like the book. You can’t be all-in on it. I understand.

So, how to win you over?

There are some industry standards these days. You need a website. You have to get on Facebook, and Instagram, and something else, maybe this new venue for people to watch other people play video games. You can buy likes from a click farm so that you seem popular.


You have to monetize and search engine-optimize.

I still don’t understand much about marketing, except that it’s sophisticated, a little frightening, and usually based on an algorithm. As somebody who’s been working on a near-future cli-fi conspiracy action-adventure comedy novel for 24 years, I can’t say I’m surprised.

It’s worth it, I think, to have fans, people who really like your stuff, not in a Stephen King’s Misery sense, of course, where they like it a little too much and then kidnap you, but in a fan fiction or The Martian way, where the fans come up with fantastic new ideas or do your research for you.

I need those fans.

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